Friday, April 1, 2011

8 weeks...

I have mixed emotions about my baby boy turning eight weeks today. My little baby is turning into a little man. I am happy because he is turning into such a fun baby, he is smiling now, and generally a pretty happy little guy, unless he is gassy. Being older, he is in a little more of a routine. As long as he doesn't have too much change on a daily basis. He is definitely happier in the morning, but pretty much a good baby all day long. The past 2 weeks we spent a lot of time at my parents because my older sister Brie was in town, and he was just talking and smiling in the early morning. He is so cute! He likes to go on walks, usually he falls asleep, but that's ok. Off-roading is what Jace likes best though, he likes the bumpiness. Good thing I have a jogging stroller. I enjoyed myself so much though with my parents, we went on a lot of walks, and I was close again so I was able to visit some of my good friends.

Jace getting older is a good thing because I am getting the routine down and he is a little more fun, but 8 weeks is also very hard because I start work again on Monday and I will have to leave him. I love working don't get me wrong. I enjoy being a hygienist so much and I am looking forward to talking with my patients again and all the people that I work with, but my heart breaks that I have to leave Jace so soon.

If Mark and I were still together, I probably would have still had to work, because at the time I got pregnant we were looking to buy a house. But I know I would not be working 4 days a week. I am thankful that it is only 4 days. I know many women and mothers out there have to work 5 days a week, and it may come to that for me too, but I am thankful that right now it is only 4. I feel like going to work I am going to miss so much. A friend of mine has her daughter in day care said that when her daughter started going the caretaker had mentioned that she wouldn't tell the mom (my friend) any type of milestones that may have happened while she was at daycare, that way when the mom saw anything it would be like the first time for her, I think that is what I am going to ask Molly to do too.

Which brings me to my next thought. I am so thankful for Molly. She has no idea how thankful I really am, or maybe she does. It has been so much fun for me to get to spend time with her and talk with her, we are getting to be such good friends, not that we weren't before, but this has made us closer. I don't know what I would do without her. I feel so much better working knowing that Jace will be with here with Molly, close by.

I just wish I didn't have to go back to work so soon. It's weird I feel like I was in school and now I have to go back after my summer break and I am just not ready, and I am scared because I have been gone so long, will I be able to adjust and get back into the groove? I am sure
that I will, I just hope my patients on Monday don't get scared when they see me all red-faced and puffy eyed from crying so hard because I had to leave my baby at home.

Which brings me to my next thought. I am thankful that I have been able to nurse Jace, but my
feelings about that are bittersweet too. It has been wonderful to bond with Jace, and I am thankful for the opportunity, but I am not looking forward to pumping in between patients during the day when right now when he is hungry I am here. Also I am not looking forward to going into the supply room to pump. It is definitely not the ideal situation, but I will make it work. Luckily I can go home at lunchtime to feed Jace, another reason I am glad I live so close to work. I mean if I have to work at least I am close by, right?

It is just that these past 10 weeks have been so nice. 2 weeks of bed rest (not that great, but at least I was off work), and 8 weeks of being with Jace and my family. I am sure that it wont be as scary as I am thinking, I tend to worry more than I should, but I am still sad. Thank goodness I ended up with a c-section because it gave me 2 extra weeks!

Wow, I am just rambling aren't I? How about some pictures now?

Jace loves bath time!
One month pictures, I saw some pictures of my friends baby and she had onesies on with how old in months she was on the front and I thought it was such a great idea. Come to find out they are stickers, so I found some boyish ones (ties) and am doing the same thing for Jace.
One of my all time favorite pictures.
Harvey just sat and watched Jace, he was jealous he wanted to be in pictures too.
Harvey got his chance. As soon as I picked Jace up, Harvey crawled on and posed for me, I didn't even call him up there. (I think he's a little jealous of Jace right now)
This picture doesn't do justice of how hilarious Jace's legs looked. They were just dangling, he was out! (Excuse my ugly appearance).
I went and visited my friend Tawnya from hygiene school, and we visited some of our instructors.
Jace and Madalyn, his new friend. He is 5 days older than she is!

Me and my sisters. And Jace of course. They look sooo good, and I look so terrible, I know I know I just had a baby, but still. I don't think I am going to like many pictures of myself for awhile. At least Jace looks good:) A version of this picture is also on my moms and my sisters blog, I didn't want to be left out:)
Molly took this cute picture of Jace while I was at church, she got a good smile. Jace loves his Aunt Molly, and I love this outfit! Thanks Mal! The socks on the hands aren't too cute, but are necessary, his hands are always freezing! (and he likes to scratch)
A better view of Jace's cute outfit, and just another picture of my baby:)
This onesie says mommy's new man, and Jace definitely is my new man! (my only man). He looks so funny in this picture, like "mom, really another one?" I love his little belly and double chin!

I know I shouldn't gripe, it could be much worse, and I am thankful for the time that I get to spend with Jace.

On a different note, I am excited for general conference! I can't wait to hear what our leaders have to say to us this weekend! I hope you all tune in!

Thanks for letting me ramble on! Wish me luck on Monday, that poor first patient....